Tell the Truth (The Whole Truth)

name: Mandy

date entered: 26/03/07

country: Australia

story:

I love being a Mum. But when you are pregnant, people say the scariest things to you, which makes you think you will hate being a Mum - "You'll never sleep again" - "You'll be up to your armpits in baby poo" - "being a parent changes you forever". These things were very scary for me, because sleep was my favourite thing, poo my least favourite, and I didn't want to change - I liked who I was and where I was, and was very determined that my baby would fit into my schedule and things would continue as they were.

So what happened? Everything that people said came true, (I don't sleep, I often have an impromptu shower due to cleaning up nasty nappy or potty accidents, and I have a completely different schedule based on my family and not just me) but I wasn't devastated like I thought I would be. True disaster stories are told to us in an effort to prepare us for the constant, very hard, always challenging, always changing job of being a Mum. They didn't prepare me - just scared me - because many people I talked to left out the positive.

You don't know until you have been a parent. I hated it when parents would say that to me when I was pre-baby, it sounds so pretentious, but then it is true! When the stories I was told pre-baby started to come true, I would say to myself, "Oh yeah, I was told this would happen", but it was okay - I could survive it - because it was all part of the precious adventure of motherhood, and it was all because of my precious little girl (and now boy, too) that I was experiencing these changes in my life, and when looked at in context of the relationship with my children, I would do anything for them: clean vomit, sit up all night with a fevered child who convulses, feed my daughter to sleep on a CAT scan bed so that she didn't have to have a general anaesthetic, sleep upright with my child with reflux resting on my chest so that they could get some unbroken sleep, administer suppositories, go to the toilet with the runs whilst baby was breastfeeding (let down reflex triggered it for the first six weeks).

But then I get: pats from my baby boy who squeezes my nose and squeals in delight when I blow a raspberry on his palm, cuddles from my daughter who says "I love you three, Mama" and "I miss you much Mama", my daughter who helps me with shopping saying, "I poop it in the trolley? (put)", the very first wee in a potty (yes, it is that exciting, I rang my parents!), and so many other most wonderful moments. And fantastically, at least for now, my children love me unconditionally - they don't care if I haven't brushed my hair, and I can make a mistake and say sorry then they have forgotten it within five minutes.

So, what is my advice? Just this - when you are telling someone the Truth about Motherhood (and we should be honest) - remember to tell them that it is worth it and why!

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