60 Minutes story - 'Housewife Superstars'

25 June 2009

comments (1)

The other week 60 minutes ran a story entitled 'Housewife Superstars'.  For the full story click here; this was the prelude:

Way back in the Dark Ages, in the 1950s, a woman's place was in the home. Like it or lump it, housework was the ultimate satisfying career.

If you think those days are long gone, we've got some news for you. Some women who have it all, have had enough.

More and more want to go back to the 50s to live the way mum and granny did. They're giving the old-time feminists the flick and ditching their jobs, staying home to look after hubby and the kids.

Must the media continually encourage slinging matches between women instead of simply noting diversity and trends?

So what if we are starting to have women who feel a bit disillusioned with the juggling act that either their mother did or that they tried?  So what if some are deciding to stay home with the kids instead of getting their partner to?

So what if some are choosing a combination of everything, at different times?

And so what if others are like the original feminists who wished for their lives to go far beyond the home?

Stop slamming feminism, stop slamming stay at home mums, and for goodness sake stop slamming diversity! There are different expressions of lifestyle for different mums – and these can change over time.

Can’t we get it into our collective heads that a full time mother today might become a career woman tomorrow?  Our lives are not defined forever by the choices that we are making at this moment. 

There may be a move for more women to stay home when their children are young but, thanks to feminism, these women had their education and career before kids and can re-incarnate themselves later however they want to.  And if they don’t want to, well isn’t feminism all about choice? 

If we are going to point the finger at anything it would be why women are feeling like home or career is an either or thing.  Is it that there are not enough truly family friendly jobs out there – for both men and women?  Is it that some men still need to do more around the home?  Is it that there are not enough quality child care options available and/or family support?  Is it that society still has limited definitions of gender?

The happy mums who are living their life however they want to should not be the ones concerning us.  The mums who feel forced to live a life that they don’t want to, whose situation is not good for themselves or their family – they are the ones that we should be concerned about.  Job or no job.

Comments:

Bindii

(sent via email July 6th 2009 and reproduced with permission)

I did watch the 60 minutes things and boy wasn't my husband cranky when I agreed with most of it.  I too would rather stay at home - not because I'm particularly maternal rather I'm tired of doing too many jobs, part-time paid work, full-time unpaid maid and nanny... Tired of organising/meal planning/weekly shop... I'm just unappreciated and tired!  I'd like more 'me time' instead of squeezing it in between chores.  (Betcha any second the spouse will come in and bitch 'are you going to be on that thing all night?'.)  (AND YEP HE DID!! - See what I mean.)

I grew up living in a flat above our family business, I watched my mother work all day in the the shop then head up stairs and do all the woman's work.  I remember her rushing out to put a load of washing on/off the line between customers and us kids never being able to tell her/Dad our exciting day at school when arrived home, rather we had to run upstairs and 'be quiet, do homework'.  I learnt how to put on a roast (including the vegies) at an early age - it was at least something I could do for Mum.

Interestingly, my maternal grandmother was a seamstress at my very own mother was placed into full-time day-care - back in the late 1940s it wouldn't have been the norm.   My grandmother didn't even take her kids on holidays  - cruises on the Pacific, on the Indian-Pacific train.... She left my mother and uncle at home with their grandmother (i.e. my great-grandmother).

I refused to be like Mum nor like my grandmother - so I opted for working school hours , doing the school run rush - juggling school holidays/hoping I can get leave (missed out on two lots this year) for.  I fight to keep my part-time hours - discovered it's the same with other part-timers (Mums too), we seem to do MORE than the full-timers - we have lunches at desks and don't have the luxury of 'doing it later' so more effective at work I suspect.

I really don't think it's about choice - rather it's sharing the tasks involved with having a house and kids.  Did us 'career girls' really think men would help when the kids arrived - nope - coz their Dad's never did so why should they.  And now we're expected to pull in a wage and do the house/kids.  No wonder staying at home seems so good!!

Regards,

Bindii

______________________