am I the only one concerned?

I am including this post on behalf of 'frizzled' who submitted the following on the main website but it is more relevant to be included here:

The other day when i confronted my daughter's (4 yr) dance teacher about the music that had been selected for the year i was told if you dont like it leave. The music is Beep by the pussy cat dolls, I tried to explain to her that 4yr are like parrots on to deaf ears, I didnt particularly want my daughter sing "i looking at his Beep and his looking at my Beep" as we walked through a shopping centre one day, nor the fact of what her grandparents would think. I could'nt even just get her to remove the words. i have never been so shocked in my life, and i think it is the first time my daughter has been heart broken in her life. I feel i have done the right thing? suppose i will never know.
 

Please feel free to reply and comment........

__________________
mbhadmin

  #2      

I think being careful of what music you expose your children to is very important. The style and the words can be very influential. I also think that through constant exposure to 'negative' styles of music children slowly become desensitised to moral judgement. Not only in music but also in other areas of live as well.

  #3      

shades of grey

oooh, this is a curly one. I love P!nk, Eminem and *especially* Justin Timberlake's "Sexy Back" (but also Handel, and Latin American music). And i love blasting up the music on the weekend and the kids and i often have a big dance fest in the kitchen when a song i like comes on the radio . OK, the lyrics.... yes, the word "sexy" has come into DS1's vocab for example and it's only going to be a matter of time b4 DS1 asks me why it's ok for me to listen to emimen using the f*** word yet this word is a 'no go zone' in our house as it is for all swearing.

hmmm.... i know this opens me up to sounding hypocritical etc. etc. but for me the issue is larger and more complex than just protecting so called precious ears.

I want my kids to see the shades of grey in life and if that means *really* enjoying some music even though not totally agreeing with it's philosophy or lyrics, then that's OK with me. i also want them to not feel so protected that they don't learn to think for themselves about what they like/don't like - is helpful or unhelpful. i think there are bigger things in life than to worry about lyrics in a song. i want my kids to learn that music is about self-expression and some hard edge songs can actually have some really poignent and heart-felt/honest stuff to them as in the case of Eminem and Pink that people can relate to - none of this mamby pamby stuff that is not real life.

so there u have it - shoot me down in flames but i'd rather tricky stuff be the subject of an interesting conversation with my kids than the object of censorship.

maybe we need to move this thread to "controversy & debate"?

__________________
poppyg

Me - 37
DH - 39

Last edited by poppyg : 28-05-2007 at 09:16 PM.

  #4      

curly wurly alright!

My eldest, at 13, has the i pod bug and the need to download songs to the pod. I have very clearly stated that the download priviledge is contingent upon the downloads being the clean versions of songs......

........we've been clear about the use of language........he does not hear us use abusive language and we discuss the usage of words a lot in our home as we are something of wordsmiths. The 13 year old likes and employs sarcasm in his vocab and I hope he uses that and carefully placed irony on the foul mouthed and largely inarticulate troops who have no other linguistic tools.

...mind you: I did get caught! I bought the cd of a singer whose single I'd really enjoyed last year, without realising that the airplay version was the clean cut. My family stopped agog as I was playing my new purchase....and then we all had a good laugh! It gave us a fine opportunity to discuss the placement of the expletive in context and usage!

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:::iona:::

  #5    

thread moved

Moving this interesting thread to 'controversy & debate' from 'chit chat' b/c more fitting here.

Keep up the lively discussion!!

cheers

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mbhadmin

  #6      

lyrics and music ...

Hi,

yes this has been a topic of discussion in our house for some time. My kids are now 13 and 11 and a different space to a four year old mbhab... in regard to the comments by poppy... yes my son has been pretty much obsessed with Eminem for a couple of years - which has been an interesting experience for us. For a long time we held the line on the level - medium and strong - and eventually relinquished that he could buy the strong. Both hubby and I like music so are interested. We regularly listen to son's music and have had many discussions about black american culture, hip hop culture, etc etc segregation - and we watched the movie 8 Mile (story of Eminem's life) together and liked it very much. Son likes it when we listen to his music and likes to talk about the lyrics. I must say I'm still not sure about where Eminim is at in terms of women. I really don't think he is mysoginist or homophobic, as he is often criticised - though there are trends within black american music (amongst others) that are dubious. But the we talk about that as well. One day in the car I said to son - what do you think about sluts (or something) and he just about fell off his seat - it was great to see and had something of a follow up conversation. Maybe this background made it easier when I had to have a talk with him recently about porn on the net and why we feel it is necessary to install the recently released - filter - that is available via the net from the government - re - net alert ads etc. I've been amazed at the liberal approach that many (including involved) parents have to what they let their kids see or hear - be warned if parents let their kids watch MA movies they think why not let other kids do so also when they are around. I've been caught out on this one - even with 10, 11, year olds. Anyhow, its a continuing dialogue, sometimes I feel sure about a position and many times not, but the bottom line for me has been to at least talk about my reservations, and more, and hopefully hear more about what the offspring think - at the moment they don't have a lot to say but they often have opinions about what they want to hear, or see.

cheers, ginalol

Last edited by ginalol : 13-09-2007 at 12:55 PM. Reason: clarification

  #7      

But what about 'sexy' videos...

We don't allow our son to watch video hits et al unsupervised anymore, I just found the some of the videos deeply sexulised, and too strong on drug and violence. Remembering this is shown in a G time slot but it's rated PG because of Sx and D!! Yet I love listening to the new music. Have found, that jtv on ABC is less sexy.

I haven't had an issue about swearing YET - we have trash or treasure words - what's nice and nasty. But I did catch him swearing to himself in the backyard when he dropped something - 'SH*T' he exclaimed. (Just like Mummy - woops!!)

I agree with the main thread of this conversation 'BEEP' isn't an appropriate song for a 4 y.o dance lesson - up there with 'Hey, Big Spender'!!

Shiver - we want an 4.y.o asking if she looks 'sexy' in this outfit and if she's 'bootidilicous'!!